1. The Last Supper would have been eaten the next morning — cold
2. The Ten Commandments would actually be only 5 — doublespaced and written in a large font.
3. A new edition would be published every two years in order to limit reselling.
4. Forbidden fruit would have been eaten because it wasn\’t cafeteria food.
5. Paul\’s letter to the Romans would become Paul\’s e-mail to abuse@romans.gov
6. Reason why Moses and followers walked in the desert for 40 years: they didn\’t want to ask for directions and look like freshmen.
7. Reason Cain killed Abel: they were roommates.
8. Instead of God creating the world in 6 days and resting on the seventh, he would have put it off until the night before to get it done.