If you do have faith, this is the closest to Hell you\’ll ever be.

If you\’re reading this, which you obviously are, I would like to ask a sincere favor.  Can you keep my family in your prayers?  They really need it right now, especially my extended family.  I talked to my mother on the phone today for nearly 3 hours.  And now I\’m really starting to think about things.  Life is hard.  I never really thought about it that way.  Life is difficult and your constantly making decisions that will impact you for the rest of your life.  And through all this thinking, I am reminded again of how the church knows what it\’s talking about.  Some say that the church has too many rules and regulations…..they\’re too strict.  But the older I get, the more I appreciate the rules and regulations.  Even know, I have a renewed sense of appreciation for this.  I need this.  Almost more than I need bread and water.  I need to have the boundaries.  They\’re there because He loves us.  Just like our parent\’s won\’t let us do whatever we wanted.  God is no different.  I also started thinking about how I talk alot.  I love to talk.  So much so, that I find it incredibly hard to listen.  Perhaps this is me being self-absorbed or being arrogant…..like I know what\’s going on.  In reality.  I have no idea what\’s going on.  All I know is the very little bit of God\’s plan that\’s happening right now.  And even that I can\’t understand.  I try to make sense about all of it, but there are so many gray areas.  There are so many times where I\’m not sure what to think.  I don\’t even know what I\’m saying anymore.  I know roughly what I want.  very very roughly.  And yet, the devil always manages to mess with my head.  I\’m sorry if this is a very distracted post, or if you don\’t understand.  I don\’t even really understand.  I need His peace.  I need to pray.  I need to pray deep.

“How is it, Lord, that we are cowards in everything save in opposing Thee?” – St. Teresa of Avila